As I sit crying with a heavy heart, my precious, tenderhearted son pats me saying, "It's okay, Mommy. It's okay. It's okay, Mommy, we'll catch you."

Oh to have the faith of a child with complete trust that my Father will catch every falling piece.

Whiney Toddler Day

"Do you not know? Have you not heard?

The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He will not grow tired or weary,

and his understanding no one can fathom."

Isaiah 40:28

How thankful I am for those words. As I battle my own weariness of the whining and crying and needs/wants of my precious little ones, I realized that my God doesn't grow tired or weary of me. My voice is never like fingernails on a chalkboard. Yes, He wants me to stop complaining, but it's not because He needs a break from me. He simply wants me to trust Him more. He loves when I ask things from Him because He desires to give good things to me; yet when He says, "No" or "Wait," He wants me to believe He has the best in mind for me. How thankful I am that He does not grow tired or weary. He never puts me off because He doesn't want to deal with me. If only I could love my kids even a fraction of the way He loves me. If only I lived my life fully accepting His unconditional, completely free gift of love.

No more records to break

Because he just couldn't stand it, he kept trying...














While I was getting ready for bed, he bowled a perfect game. He will always be the first in our home, and I will only be able to tie him. My stint as the best at a video game has come to an end (a quick one at that too). Now he says bowling is boring after repeating this several times. Be relieved - this is the last Wii bowling post for the blog. All else will pale in comparison to him reaching perfection.

Record breaker

Well, Clay couldn't stand to be co-leader in bowling with me so he had to go one better. The best part is that he was using his left-handed Mii while bowling with his right hand!

Congrats, sweetie!!! You're the best once again.

Our weekend

Here's the kids' newest place to watch Ollie...too cute!













It's been another full weekend here. It started with Uncle Eric's birthday celebration. While much calmer than the kids' parties we've attended over the last few weeks, we still had a great time. The kids loved the time with their cousins, and they came home with a new "pet" - FISH! Kadyn and Dylan each have some that the kids love, and Aunt Kristi had an extra set in her classroom that she shared with our kids. They have been a HUGE hit. This morning the boy's first words were about the fish waking up. We couldn't ask for a better pet - no food, no clean up and no fear of death. Thanks, Aunt Kristi!

We spent Saturday afternoon at a wedding. We clean up kind of nice, don't we? I had to get a picture since we don't dress up that often. Next time we need to make sure to move the toys...
I must add that it was the best eating we've done at a wedding in a long time...my mouth wants more of that pesto cream sauce! YUM!


These are quick pictures from before church this morning. Don't they just look too cute? The girl continues to make me laugh. This morning she got all excited when I told her it was time to put on her dress. She rushed to her room all smiles. She enjoyed getting all dolled up and quickly went to her shoe drawer. I pulled out the two options that matched and she let me know which one she wanted. She was adamant about not wearing her white sandals. Too funny!

His turn

Our girly girl and silly boy

I would have a girly-girl, wouldn't I? I was quite the mix as a young gal - Mom said I would insist on dresses and all kinds of jewelry and then run around with the boys. I'm not quite so girly these days, but our gal is making up for it! She has been all about shoes for some time now. Then she added a love for a certain hat (whether it matches or not), and now she's added a backpack to her necessities. She was walking around tonight with a handful of accessories - hat, shoes, backpack, and paci. I think I've said it before, but we're in some major trouble. (My dad gets such a kick out of her shenanigans - he feels like we've stepped back 30 years!)













The boy wanted some camera action tonight too. He wasn't so sure what I was doing at first as is evident by his face. Then he decided to say "Cheese!" with me, but preferred to look at me instead of the camera. (Do you see my many freckles? We've been in the sun A LOT this summer, and makeup just doesn't cover them anymore!)

Someone Else

Today, they need someone else. Someone stronger. Someone more patient. Someone more creative. Someone less selfish. Someone less needy. Someone more faithful. Someone more content. Someone with more energy. Someone more trusting. Someone less prideful. Someone more humble. Someone smarter. Someone better. Someone other than me.

Father, I ask that You give them what they need in spite of me being the one that's here.

Saturday "fun"

***UPDATED WITH PICTURES***

I've added pictures of the stitches and the bandage. If you have a weak stomach, just bypass them.

This is the last picture taken before...

CLAY vs. CHAINSAW

Recap:
Four hours of QT in the ER.
Chainsaw: Uninjured.
Clay: 11 stitches in his left index finger.

"Ollie"

This is "Ollie". With the exit of our dog, Ollie has become increasingly comfortable in our back yard. He resides under our deck and has grown quickly this summer. He spends more and more time out in the open, and I finally got a picture of him. His name is Ollie after Ollie on The Wonder Pets - one of the boy's favorites right now. The kids love to watch Ollie through the window. We're just hoping Ollie doesn't find a "friend"... one rabbit is enough.

And yet ANOTHER birthday party

Surely we are getting close to some kind of record, right? Saturday morning we played at yet another birthday party for one of the boy's friends. They have a great backyard with trees and shade. The boy enjoyed the pool, the slide, and mostly the cupcakes. The girl took some warming up after not sleeping too well, but she finally joined in the fun with the help of her dad acting silly. Nothing melts my heart more than to watch him forgo his pride for the sake of his kids.

Family fun

We had the honor of visiting with my cousin, his wife, and their son this past week while he was in town for work. We are glad his wife and boy came just to play. We played a lot, and I forgot my camera most of the time! We ate/played at Chick-Fil-A, went to the bounce house place, did play group, swam at their hotel, hung out at my folks' and my sisters' - just to name a few things. They also visited the zoo and the aquarium during their time here. It was a crazy week with our boy at camp in the mornings, but it was so worth being on the go. Friday night the gals and kids hung at Kristi's, and I finally remembered my camera. Kadyn and Dylan had a fashion show for us, the kids colored a bit, and then we enjoyed the pool (of course). All the kids love the water. It was a bit crazy in the pool, but we had a lot of fun and laughs. Kadyn is thinking of trying out to be Seaweed Girl in some upcoming movie! Our boy started putting himself under and the girl decided she wanted nothing to do with her float.

Camp

Last week and this week the boy has been going to camp at his preschool. Last week he had his teacher from last year and they talked about creepy, crawly things in the ocean. He had a blast. He has been talking about octopus, squid, and Ms. Joanne a lot. Ms. Joanne did an awesome job again of taking pictures and sharing them. Here's a sampling of the fun he had. He has a different teacher this week and they are talking about creepy, crawly things on land. He seemed to have a good time again today, and he loves playing with the binoculars they made. It's hard to believe there's only a few more weeks until school begins.

Wii fun

Last Saturday we went to Kristi and Eric's house for the evening. We enjoyed pizza, swimming, and the Wii. We hadn't shown the boy the Wii at our house yet so it was a first for him. He was hilarious. Dylan LOVES to bowl and box (check out Kristi's blog), and makes great sound effects every time he lets the ball go. Our boy quickly picked up on the sound effects as well as how to shake the controllers to get your man to stand up after getting knocked down. While he doesn't quite get holding on to the controller, he gets quite involved while watching everyone else.

Last night we wanted to see what the girl would do since she slept through last Saturday. The kids did not disappoint. Both are quite the encourager. Here are a couple of videos so you can experience the fun. The first is of them shaking it - make sure to watch both of them. The second is of the sound effects. (Make sure to pause the player at the bottom...the sound makes the video)

Never in real life

Oh yeah, baby!

I made my sister take a picture of my score at her house last weekend (a 258, my best up to that point), but now I have out-done myself. We were escaping reality last night, and I was ON FIRE! Mind you, I can barely bowl a 50 in real life thanks to my backwards form - I step with the same foot as I bowl so the ball always hits my leg. Wrong, I know, but I've never been too athletic. What gets Clay is that I do it regardless which hand I bowl with. Left handed? Step with left foot. Right handed? Step with right foot.

Anyone want to play?

ANOTHER birthday party

July is the month of birthday parties, I tell ya! Here is one for our dear friend Lauren (or Lou as we lovingly call her) who turned 2. Her birthday is easy to remember because it's the same day as my grandfather's. Her mama threw a party extraordinaire - it's so bloomin' hot here that she cleared out her front living room so she could put a small bounce house and pool filled with balls for the kids. They served hot dogs and adorable cupcakes - and she even thought to fill a baby pool with ice to hold the kids' drinks. Streamers and balloons hung from the ceiling - it was so festive! (If you want some more great pictures, check out Abby's blog.) The boy had a blast - bouncing and cupcakes, two of his favorites. Here he is with the birthday gal and then with his best boy pal.












He did have to spend a few moments in time out, but it wasn't too traumatic for him. Amazingly, he picked out a rock and sat on it. When he saw these pictures, he remembered that he was in time out. The girl spent most of her time in someone's arms unless she was swinging. Guess she felt too cool to join in the fun. (In the pool shot, she's the one "observing" from Kristina's lap!)

We have another birthday party this Saturday, Uncle Eric's next Friday, and then another the second Saturday in August. I promise we aren't invited to EVERY party that happens either!

FYI: I'm selfish

I'm exhausted, but I can't sleep. Really I just can't turn my brain off (and my hubs smells like Bengay), and I process much better externally. So I thought I would flesh it out here and I'm going to try my best not to edit myself (very challenging for this consummate self-editor). So bear with me if this makes no sense, seems juvenile or hits you the wrong way. This post is basically to get this stuff out of my brain - and I type faster than I write.

There's a recurring two-part lesson in my life: I am selfish, and life is not about me.

I've been through God's lesson plans before on this topic; but just when I think I've got a good handle on it, He peels back another layer for me to explore.

I am one intensely selfish human being. I look at most of my life through lenses of how to make myself comfortable, how to take the easy road, and how to make sure I look good doing it (or at least have others nod approvingly). In reality though - life is not about me. It isn't about how I can be most comfortable or how I can be the best or look good to others. It was a rude awakening to me one day in the midst of a pity party about how someone else didn't seem to really care about me that said person had her own life. It wasn't that she didn't care about me, it was simply that she had more important things at that time (ie. her family). She didn't schedule her world around me (say what?). She didn't wake up thinking about how her life would affect me. She focused on the tasks in front of her that day and on the people God placed under her care. It was a rude awakening to me that a certain trial (take your pick of which one - big or small) in my life may not be about me at all. I don't know the reason why, but there are plenty of possibilities that don't include me at all. Sometimes God uses one of His vessels to get the attention of another. Perhaps I needed to walk that road so my husband would surrender one more part of himself. Perhaps it was so my father would fall more deeply in love with God. Perhaps it was so a friend would be encouraged in her own walk. Perhaps it was so someone I don't know would hear about God as one of my friends shared my story. Only God knows. He's what life is all about anyway, right?

I shouldn't take it all so personally, but unfortunately I often do. Less than I used to, but still more often than I should. When someone else succeeds, it isn't to spite me. When someone else gets recognition, it isn't because I don't deserve it. When someone else looks better than me, it isn't because God didn't love me as much. When someone else gets something I want, it isn't because He doesn't want to bless me too. Because it isn't about me. It's about what will bring Him the most glory. He is about His master plan - to seek and to save that which was lost. It isn't about my happiness or my contentment or my comfort. It isn't about my popularity, my achievements, or my agenda. It's about Him, His love, His grace, His mercy.

How much easier life would be if I could remember that in the midst of my day instead of in the wee hours of the morning!

Hi, I'm Kaci. I'm recovering from selfishness; please be patient as I try to remember that life isn't about me.

Who am I? I am Yours.

I love when a familiar song seems to come alive all over again. It happened for me today as I was driving. Thank you, Father, for calling me to be Yours. Thank you, Father, for making my salvation totally dependent upon You.

Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wandering heart.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours. I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again.
Who am I?
That the voice that calmed the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours. I am yours.

Whom shall I fear?
Whom shall I fear?
'Cause I am yours.
I am yours.

You know you're tired when...

you fall asleep at the table while eating dinner in the midst of your parents' LifeGroup fellowship (say about 30 some-odd people including kids of all ages); and you aren't disturbed by your mom pulling you into her lap so you don't hit the floor, nor are you disturbed when your dad takes you from your mom so she can eat nor when your mom takes you to lay you on the couch and you remain there for another 45 minutes or so until your dad picks you up to head to the car. And you're really tired when you cry throughout your entire bath because you are so ready for your bed even though you've just had a good nap...

If only I had video or a picture...he was the "life" of the party tonight!

I held the door

So last Wednesday-Friday our church held a community sports camp and tournament for kindergarten - 12th graders. It is our little twist on VBS. The kids play a lot, but there is a always an evangelistic devotion given while they eat.

Thursday was just one of those days for me. I was frustrated that my ability to serve without condition no longer exists. I have children to consider - meaning childcare, meals, bedtime since the camp ran from 4:30 p.m. - 8:00 p.m. I was frustrated for a myriad of other reasons as well and found myself very down about how little I feel like I'm serving right now. I enjoyed serving on Thursday (I was unable to be there Wed.), but didn't feel like I was playing a crucial role.

Still, Friday I wanted to go for some reason. I didn't really have a reason not to go help so I packed up the kids and headed out, but my frustration and pity party from the day before lingered. I geared up to help with the devotion for the kindergarten - 6th graders learning I would be counseling anyone who wanted to make a decision.

After all my internal bellyaching, God allowed me the privilege to hold the door to heaven open as two young children asked Jesus into their heart that evening. I now have a new brother and sister...and I got the joy of walking them into the family. What an honor!

I was so humbled to be a part of something so much bigger than myself - and 'gently' reminded that His ways are so beyond mine.