Much room for improvement

That's what any evaluation about any area of my life would say right now: much room for improvement. Wasn't it a mere 9 days ago that I talked about wanting to be better about jumping on here? Yeah, 9 days and no improvement. On the other hand, I console myself because there hasn't been much updating on FB either. I did post some adorable pictures, but I couldn't help showing off my knight and my princess after this weekend's birthday party for J's special gal (if she had her way, she'd marry our boy). She's already staking her claim...


I've only got a few moments, but wanted to acknowledge that our youngest is 6 months old today! 6 MONTHS! Where has it gone? Mercy, she has grown up so fast. And it seems to have all happened in the last 2 weeks. She isn't a fan of rolling over, but she can from tummy to back. She'd much prefer to just wriggle from her back to her side to turn herself around instead of rolling from her back to her tummy. She has become so observant and grabby. Necklaces, eyeglasses, earrings, drinking glasses, the remote, the phone...you name it, you have it, she wants it. She loves to sit up and is now doing well enough to enjoy the view from the front of the buggy.




Her world has really opened up. We tried a bath sitting up the other night, but I'm not sure I'll repeat it again until she's more stable. She got so excited she kept falling over and was so slippery it was hard for me to hang on. She is now on an awesome schedule (with a random night here or there). She eats at 9am, 1pm, 5 pm, and 8:30pm. She's flexible though so we can adjust those times with our schedule and everyone is happy. Randomly she wakes up early for a little snack, but it doesn't mess with the schedule too much. When not congested or bothered by teething, she is known to sleep for 9-12 hours. Awesome. Her naps would be better if we didn't have to get J to and from school. She LOVES solid food. Not a huge fan of green beans (who can blame her?), but likes most everything else we've tried. Her favs? Sweet potatoes and ANY fruit. She's making this adorable face now when she eats and is either displeased with taste or temp or when she's done. Too cute!



Okay, I really must go, but wanted to acknowledge today. There's so much more about her (she's laid back, she's now a mama's girl, and she LOVES her siblings), but I must stop for now. I'll be back...Miss E turns 3 on Sunday. Stop my heart.

Bad bad blogger

Wow - it's been like 3 weeks since my last post. This is getting ridiculous. Between 3 young kids, the "good" computer being gone most days, and plain laziness, the blog has greatly suffered. There just isn't the same time...and honestly, loading pictures here takes a lot more time than on FB. There are times I just want to share a brief story or comment...FB lends itself more to that. Guess I could do a short post, but I always feel so inclined to write more here. Or be eloquent. Or profound. Or funny. Or something other than just sharing normal, boring life. But who am I writing for anyway? I started this blog (almost 4 years ago- INSANE!) mainly for my inlaws and grandmother who live far away. I figured this was easier than emailing them pictures and stories. I also never knew who else wanted to know about our life; so I figured a blog would allow those who wanted to check in with us the freedom to do so at their own choosing instead of being forced to read my emails. I found it a great way to document life and process it as well (wonderful for us external processors). Even had a 2nd blog for a while to entertain my spiritual musings.

But as life has been a bit, um, challenging over the last 2 years, I found myself editing on the blog. Some things I wasn't ready to share. Some things were private family matters. Some things weren't mine to discuss in such a public format, but greatly impacted our family. This gal isn't too keen on sharing how many days I've raised my voice at the kids or wished I could have a couple weeks of vacation...only to have my heart melted by those same kids hours later. I want to brag on my kids, but don't want to be one of "those" parents. And with the tough times of the last couple of years, some of my insecurities have returned and I'm not much for putting myself out there to potentially be criticized (even if I never know it...I might think someone might think it. Crazy, I know. This gal needs some sleep.). And some things I hesitate to put in writing for fear it might come back to haunt me or a loved one might have me committed (one particular thought tonight lends itself to both of those!).

Anyway, I've watched the blog become more picture posting and basic facts. And lately I can't even keep up with that...no Christmas photos, no birthday party photos of Miss E who will be 3 in 2 weeks, no picture updates on the youngest who is almost 6 months (SAY WHAT? Where has it gone?).

What's the point of this rambling? I'm not sure. I can't sleep. I got a 2 hour nap today, and the hubs is out at game night. All 3 kids are asleep, and I find myself a bit lonely I guess. They are growing up too fast, and I'm still amazed at how much I love each one of those little guys at the other end of the house - even though J has become increasingly argumentative lately, E's need for my touch and attention can drive me batty, and McK isn't handling her current cold and possible teething well (thus giving me the chance to relive college with a semi-all nighter the other night and LOTS of screaming for a couple of days). I swell with pride as overnight my son has become a reader - at 4 1/2. I giggle with delight at my oldest daughter's singing and dancing - all of her own creation. I melt at my youngest's full-body smile. They are beautiful. They mostly look like their daddy and act like their mother - heaven help us! - and I fail them miserably each day. But then there are moments I catch a glimpse that they get it...when they tell me Jesus/God loves them more than Mommy or that God wants them to listen and obey or when they pray or when tell me they want to go to heaven to see Jesus - and Miss E tells me she can when Jesus lives in her heart. Maybe I'm not as bad of a mom as I often feel I am. Maybe I'm not wasting as much time as I thought (but there is a lot of wasting being done). Maybe I'm doing something right so that they know I love them even though I've yelled and spanked and lost my cool more times than I can count. Praise the Lord He's able to use this mess to reach their hearts.

I'll stop the madness for tonight. Bottom line (man, that sounds like my dad) - I hope to get back to blogging regularly soon, but let's not hold our breath on that one - we know we'd all pass out! Here's a few pictures to tide you over...

...and now hubs just walked in and is wondering WHAT THE CRAP I'm doing blogging at 1:30 am... his next question, "Are you alright?"

"Yes, honey, just one of those introspective nights."

It started with this almost 11 years ago when we said, "I do."

Now we've multiplied to this.

One of my all-time favs of me with my boy.

The girls - who've greatly increased the amount of gray I now cover.

5 months already?

My baby turns 5 months old tomorrow. She's sleeping in her crib for the first time tonight. It's way past time, but various reasons kept it from happening until now. Funny how I told Clay earlier today that it needed to happen soon or we would never get her out of our room...then when I decided just to take the plunge and do it, I found myself wanting to hold her longer while my heart ached that my baby is as old as she is. Everything with Mr. J was so special since we thought he may be our only child...the child we waited so long for. Miss E cried so much and slept so little that her first year of life is mostly a blur. Now, McK truly may be our last child. That possibility gives me pause so many times...like tonight. Will I ever have an infant sleeping in my room again? McK's at such a fun stage - she's becoming more aware of her surroundings each day and LOVES her brother and sister. Nothing makes her smile bigger. She's all about grabbing at whatever she can get her hands on and she's even sat up by herself! She's not rolled over yet, but her tummy time is limited thanks to her active siblings. After a few weeks of being a drama gal, she has relaxed into an easy-going chica. I can't believe she's been with us 5 months already!

The last few weeks have been full of pondering for me. If you've read my blog much at all, you know that dates often give me pause. I find myself reflective and often too analytical for my own good. The last few weeks are no different as we turned a leaf on a new year and marked some not-so-great anniversaries (not to mention the 25+ hours we spent driving!). 2009 was not a stellar year...honestly, the birth of McK and marking 10 years of marriage are truly the highlights of a pretty dark, stormy year. But through the storm, I've learned a lot about myself, my relationships, and most importantly, God.

Well, my musing has been interrupted by a little girl who woke up in an unfamiliar place.

Off to hold on to her infancy a little longer...

John Deere Party

Nothin' says boy like a John Deer birthday party - especially for a first birthday! We celebrated Cooper last Saturday at his grandparents' home. They have an awesome playroom, and everyone seemed to have a great time.

A rundown of the pictures:
Miss E was her usual shy self (only seen when others are around)...Miss McK found a new friend who made her laugh...Daddy would not be happy her new friend seemed to want a kiss... Miss E ready for some cake and ice cream... Big J blowin' his horn... the birthday boy... who wasn't that interested in his cake...until someone gave him a fork!... Miss E with Kristie...Kristie's son checking out who his mama is holding...my big kids enjoying the ice cream (surprisingly this time they skipped cake)...my country girls...

Sick and tired

The kids got hit with a stomach bug last night. We are thankful it is already gone, but the effects are still felt. Miss E and I pulled an all-nighter which is not all it was cracked up to be back in college! She wanted to rock with me so bad today, but I had a few things on my to-do list. She fell asleep waiting for me...melted my heart so I sat down to rock with her as soon as she woke up!

Exhaustion

Miss E battled a high fever Wednesday night. I gave her Motrin to help her sleep and it had the opposite effect. Sure she slept from 8 p.m. - 1 a.m., but we aren't sure she slept any after that. Clay put her back in bed, awake, at 3:30 a.m. At 4:45 she called out saying she needed to potty. She went, and 15 minutes later was up again ready for her day and breakfast. She ran strong (with a few moments of calmly sitting) most of the day, but finally crashed out about 3:30 p.m. in the arms of my mom's best friend. Pat came to help Mom pack up the house (she's moving in with Kristi tomorrow), and we got to visit Thursday afternoon. Miss E fought it hard...even waking with a start and an "uh, I don't think so" look when Pat tried to lay her back. Exhaustion finally took over and she got a good hour or so nap. Oh, to have the stamina of an almost 3 year old!

Christmas Dresses

Mimi bought the girls coordinating Christmas dresses before McK was even born. It was warm enough this past Sunday that we got to wear them without additional undergarments. Miss E wasn't too cooperative about taking pictures so I only have a couple of them individually. Aren't they adorable? They got LOTS of compliments!

Trying to get a shot of the whole dress*** McK's dress with her surprised look*** A fake smile*** A real smile

Men with facial hair

And a train... thought it was adorable that the big kids made a train with McK the other night while she was in her bumbo. They are so ready for her to get bigger so they really can play with her!





Pop came for dinner the other night since we didn't get to see him over Thanksgiving and he missed J's Christmas program. We had a great time...and the kids were SO excited! After dinner, J performed a couple of his songs for Pop. Miss E couldn't stop hugging on her Pop. McK finally woke up and spent some quality time with Pop. They were sad to see him head home, and we all look forward to having him share Christmas morning with us!

Will wonders never cease...J asked to sit on Santa's lap this year! His first 2 Christmases we tortured him with the traditional Santa photo op. Last year, we just skipped it. When we did a family photo at Prairie Lights last year, we made sure he was pretty far from Santa and he still looked terrified! When Miss E showed her hesitation toward the man in red when we made McK's Christmas present, I decided once again we should just let it go. We ended up at the mall tonight, and the kids started asking where Santa was. We walked to his "house" just to see what would happen. Miss E immediately let us know that waving to him from a distance was just fine with her. J seemed hesitant at first, but then started asking to sit on his lap. We had to wait a few minutes, but he kept telling us he wanted to talk to Santa. Sure enough, he walked right up and sat on his lap! He told Santa that he wanted cars and monster trucks. He never ceases to amaze me with how he is growing up... I'm so glad they allowed us to snap a couple of pictures!

Side by side

After some absence, I'm a blogging nut tonight. Enjoy these posts with more pictures than most can stand...all for the grands, great, aunt, and other family that don't get to experience our life on a regular basis.
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All 3 of our kids have worn the same outfit during their first Christmas season. Interesting part is the age difference and how well they filled it out. Thought a side-by-side comparison would be fun.

2005 - J - 5 months *** 2007 - E - 10 months*** 2009 - McK - 4 months

Christmas Program

Sunday was J's Christmas program at church. The kids all looked great that morning in their Christmas attire - so pictures had to be taken. Later that night, J finally got to perform on stage. He's been talking about it and practicing for DAYS/WEEKS! This boy loves to sing. He provided many laughs...especially with his "six geese a laying" choreography and adding his own throughout the show. He really did well...and is still singing the songs today. We were so excited Grannylou, Aunt Kristi, Kadyn and Dylan got to come. And we all enjoyed some amazing desserts after the program.


Here's a short video of the last verse of 12 Days of Christmas...our little man really gets into it!