Why are we so quick to grow up?

Why was I in such a hurry to grow up? You hear it all the time when you are young from those older than you..."being older isn't all it's cracked up to be". However, we fail to listen to them and simply rush through life always ready to be one step ahead of where we are. I have had much time for reflection over the last 10+ months... and in this time of relflection I realize how quickly I sped through life. God has provided me many moments of fond recollection of times past and how different things were.

No one tells you that when you get sick when you are older, the "magic fairies" aren't there to clean up after you throw up, change your sheets while you shower, or provide hot meals. Nope, they seem to disappear... and you are all on your own to clean up the mess, keep up the house, make the meals, and take your medicine. This hit home when the stomach virus hit our house... my mom did happen to be here at one point so that helped, but I still had to tell her where everything was! Then there's the whole paying bills, owning a house, car insurance, car repairs, clothing, medical payments... and the list goes on. A friend and I were laughing the other day as we made our list of things we each needed to fix around our home (actually, the yard was the focus that day) that everyone says you need to own a house, but fails to tell you how much work and money it takes to keep up that house and to make sure it doesn't lose market value. Our to-do list seems to keep getting longer! We used to have the entire weekend to play except for maybe an hour or so to clean... now we have to plan around home projects and budget for the big things and such. What fun is that? And now that I stay at home with my son, I don't really get a "sick day". Sure, I could totally neglect everything; but unlike earlier in life, no one will do the laundry, feed and bathe my child, fix a meal, etc. I miss those magic fairies! I thought of this today as I mustered the energy to fold clothes that had been on the kitchen table for 2 days, put up the dishes in the dishwasher and reload it, pay the current due bills, and straightened the living room - all during the boy's afternoon nap.

Don't get me wrong - I love my life! I love being a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, and more. But I didn't appreciate all that my parents did for me in those days or how easy life was back in the day. I was too caught up in what others thought of me and making sure I fit in. I thought if I could just be 13...16...18...21...life would be better. Thing is, I am realizing that better isn't the word to describe it. Different. Each stage has its pros and cons, but each is beautiful and fun and exciting in its own way.

The challenge is to appreciate what you have while you are in it instead of long after it is gone. Like I would have thanked those "magic fairies" (okay, okay, I know it was you, Mother) for all their hard work during many illnesses. I would have focused more on friendships instead of boyfriends. I would have done less of what I thought others expected of me and more of what I wanted to do. I would tell those who touched my life that they touched my life and how. I would thank those who challenged me, pushed me, and encouraged me. I would laugh more and take myself a lot less seriously. I would hope to realize that each stage is a fleeting moment and bigger things lie beyond. I would focus more on the moment instead of pining away for what I hope is coming... because it may not come and I sure don't want to miss this moment.

Being present in this moment... not missing what may seem mundane with my son because one day he will be too big to hold... laughing at the little things with my husband because we are not promised tomorrow... listening to God because there is much to learn each day. Being present in this moment so that my life is made of up a life lived instead of a life hoped for and dreamed about.