Musings

It's been a couple of those kinds of days. Highs. Lows. Challenges with the kids. Productivity. Laziness. Endearing moments. Moments that make me want to crawl back in bed. Laughter followed by fighting back tears.

26 days.

I find myself tonight being a bit girly about things (not anything new for those who've been around me for any length of time over the last few weeks). There's this big change coming in our lives, and yet everyone else's life keeps going at normal pace. We surely aren't the only ones with big change coming. Some of my friends will be sending their babies to school (the real kind, not just preschool) for the first time next month. But still, it's a pretty big change happening in these walls in the next 3 1/2 weeks. WOW!

The third child is so different. It's hard to make plans about who will care for the children and such because it all depends on when Miss M decides to make her appearance. I remember with J I sent the family a detailed letter about how we wanted things to happen while they were at the hospital and in the days following. There's no point for that kind of letter now because there are too many "X" factors and too many changes this time. Even with Miss E's arrival we were at a hospital 10 minutes from our house and 2 from my folks. J was young enough that he was content to hang at the hospital with us for hours, and it was a quick solution if he needed to leave. This time the hospital is 30 minutes from home assuming it isn't rush hour. The kids haven't lasted longer than 20 minutes the last few times we've gone to welcome friends' babies. Mom is working full time...at a job that is 45 minutes from our side of the world. I have lots of offers to help, but everyone seems to be traveling at some point over the next month. I realized tonight that the likelihood of my entire gaggle (those in TX anyway) being in town when Miss M arrives is next to impossible. Makes it easy for a hormonal gal to begin to feel like this child's arrival might be overlooked. Don't get me wrong - I know it won't be, but it can feel that way. It's our 3rd kid - not as much "newness" to this as before. Due to changes in everyone's work situation, my inlaws won't be rushing here upon the call that we're on the way to the hospital. I need my mother-in-law's help the week we get home so she'll come a day or two later and then return with Granddaddy and Auntie Claire hopefully over Labor Day.

It's just gonna be different.
That's not bad - just different.

I've told Clay I'm looking forward to those hours of calm in the hospital when there will be more time just the 3 of us than we had with the other 2 kids. It may seem like a vacation after the "fun" we've been having with our eldest ones...and the anticipated adjustment period once we bring Miss M home. (I got a taste of how clingy the kids might be this past Saturday after we had a date night followed by Grannylou spending the night so I could sleep in. Once I appeared Saturday morning, Grannylou was chopped liver. I'm hoping Mimi doesn't get her feelings hurt if it takes them a few days to allow her to satisfy their needs after I've been MIA for a day or two.)

Anyway, I'm just processing this all out loud...I'm always a thinker before big changes occur... and now that we're basically ready for her arrival I don't have as much to keep my mind occupied.

Sorry to dump it all out here...