Greener grass

I saw a piece of flair on Facebook that seemed to put words to a thought that's been swimming around my head a lot over the past week so:

The greener grass on the other side is probably artificial turf.

Have you had those moments when you find yourself longing for what someone else has? Have you had those moments when someone is raving about your spouse, your child, your parent, or your sibling and you are wondering if they know the same person you do?

I have. Growing up my sister and I were often asked how great it was to have our parents as parents. My sister came up with a great response, "Yeah, they don't have to discipline you!" To everyone else, my folks were the cool ones. My senior spring break my friends wanted my folks to chaperon - how was that spring break for me? To my sister and I, they were our parents; at times, we felt they were complete idiots and totally unfair. There are times people share wonderful things about Clay and I'm thinking, "Uh, you don't have to deal with _____." And the kids always seem to put on a great show for everyone else so people think I'm lying when I talk about our struggles. (Hang with me, this is not a bashing my family email...)

I've watched/heard others think the same thing. I've had people say they wish their hubbies were more like Clay in some area or would do "x" like _______. I've had wives share that their husbands have told them they wish she was more like _________.

The grass often seems greener on the other side, right?

I've been pondering this phenom a lot over the last week or so, and I've come to realize that it usually isn't. That marriage that may seem so great may have huge problems behind closed doors. That man that seems to be an amazing spiritual leader to everyone else may have an anger issue or rarely spend time in the Word each day. That woman who seems to have it all together may be falling apart on the inside battling insecurities and fears. We only see part of the picture; and often that picture is strategically displayed. I know I've hidden behind smiles and niceties to maintain the "I'm in control" image I like to display. (Disclaimer - these examples are not specific examples of people I know...I just wanted to clarify!)

As I've found my mind comparing myself, my marriage, my husband and my children to others this week, God has graciously reminded me that all those people and relationships are just as flawed as I feel we are. No one is perfect. No relationship is perfect. Just because I don't see imperfection doesn't mean it isn't there. And regardless, what works for others may not be what's best for me or my relationships. With God's help, I must figure out my own path to being what brings God the most glory.

Sometimes that "greener" grass has just been carefully spray painted.